Warning: This post is probably going to get really confusing :)
So right now I am working as a part-time receptionist, but I was hired on as only temporary. They didn't give me an exact date of when they wouldn't need me anymore. So I have been applying for other jobs because I didn't want to run into the situation of them telling me they don't need me anymore & then I'm jobless. I wanted to be ahead of the game. So I applied and applied and applied.
I then got an interview on March 26th. They loved me & practically hired me on the spot, but had to make sure I didn't have a criminal background. So then on Thursday I went into work [my receptionist job] & they told me they wouldn't need me in 2-3 weeks. After work I received a phone call & was offered the job. Kinda crazy how that worked out, huh? I accepted the job & I am set to start April 16th.
Let me give you some background info about the job I accepted. I get a laptop, my own desk, a little verizon hotspot wifi, & the title of Care Coordinator. In a nut shell, I will go into people's homes and make sure everything is going okay with the parents and children. I will give them whatever resources I can and do reports for DHS. I will drive all around the county [I will get paid mileage] to meetings with the families and drop off children if needed. The pay isn't great, but you have to start somewhere. This job is beyond full-time, meaning 40-45 hours, however it can even be up to 60 hours a week. It also requires weekends sometimes.
Okay, now remember I am also a full-time grad student. That meaning I am taking 9 credit hours, which doesn't sound like a lot because in undergrad I'd take 15-18 credit hours a semester, but somehow I think I'd go crazy if I had any more hours. This is my first semester as a grad student & it is only going to get harder from here on out.
I was excited at first when I applied because this job required a bachelors degree and with my just graduating in December I was so excited to put all my hard work now into use! I then got an interview. I wasn't excited at all. I don't know why - there was just no excitement there. I then went to the interview - I wasn't the least bit nervous. I get nervous VERY easily and for the most minor things. It was so weird. It was the easiest , flow-iest, one of the best interviews I'd ever had because I was so at ease. There were no signs of nerves. At all. I then was offered the job & accepted it & again I wasn't really that excited. I wasn't jumping up & down screaming [like I was when I found out I was accepted into grad school].
So now my last day at the receptionist job will be April 15th and my first day at the new job will be April 16th. I am having second thoughts & doubts constantly. I know that I will learn an immense amount & it will be great to put on my resume. I love that you have to have a degree to have this job because I didn't get a degree for nothing! I know this job is important & I will be changing lives & it will be extremely rewarding.
But there is something holding me back.
I don't know if I will be able to handle this job & go to grad school. It just sounds like way too much. I will have no life. I will literally get up, go to work, go to school, and go to bed. Only to do it all over the next day. That doesn't sound appealing to me at all. I understand that you have to work your way up & may have to start out with a crappy job, but I don't feel like I'm in that point in my life where I necessarily have to do that just yet. I'm worried that this job will become my # 1 priority when school needs to be my #1 priority right now. I'm in school learning about what I'm going to do for the rest of my life & I just don't feel like a job should overtake that. As weird as it may sound I feel like this job would rob me of all the potential I have for grad school. I feel like the only reason I am taking this job is because my receptionist gig is over & I need a job. I can't be jobless. End of story. I have to have a job.
So I have been praying & praying trying to figure out what to do, but I feel like I am getting no direction whatsoever. I feel so lost. I have no idea what the right decision is or if there even is a right decision. I don't know what God wants me to do. I don't know if he is giving me the option to pick or if I am just not listening. I keep thinking "this is a sign for me to do this" but then something else happens and I think that's a sign to do the opposite. What am I supposed to do when I have no idea what direction God is pointing me towards?
So right now I'm continuing to pray about it & will hopefully have reached a decision before I start the new job. Please pray for me to figure out what I'm supposed to do because this girl has no clue!
This was totally longer than I intended it to be. I could have totally written way more, but I'm done I promise! If you read the whole things you are a trooper & if you skipped the middle part then I don't blame you - I would have done the same :)
Okay. So.
ReplyDeleteI'll give you whatever expertise in this area I have.
But it's not much. So take it for what it's worth.
Keep applying. Especially until this job [the secretary one] is up.
But if nothing else comes, start with the job you already got. The care coordinator one.
It may be a stepping stone to whatever is next.
God often uses jobs we never thought we'd have to teach us some things until the next right job comes along.
Keep applying. Keep your ears open.
I have often taken jobs that were only for a season. It's amazing how even the jobs that were for a season stay with us for long after the season ends:)
Good luck to you.
Your #1 Blogging Fan-
Meggan
I don't think you should look at this as a right vs. wrong scenario. Sometimes we look at decisions like this and we ask this question, "God what is your will here?" The problem with that question is that there's only one option and if you don't pick the right option, you're outside of the will of God. God's will just doesn't work that way and this isn't a will of God question. It's a difficult position, for sure, but it's not a will of God question. God's will is that you love Him above everything else because loving anything else more than you love Him is idolatry. His will is that you love your neighbor as yourself. His will is that you make disciples by leading others to faith in Christ and by teaching and admonishing those who have come to faith in Christ.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'm not saying is that God doesn't care about your decision. That's not true at all. You have tremendous worth in His eyes and He wants you to seek Him about this decision. He wants you to boldly come before His throne and cast all your cares on Him. But this is not a right vs. wrong question this is a, "What is the wise thing to do?" question. Wisdom might be to cut back on your course load so you can gain experience at a job that will look good on your resume and advance your career down the road. Wisdom might be to take the job and continue the job search. Wisdom might be to refuse the job and continue looking for something that will give you the flexibility necessary for your classes.
I've been reading the book "Every Good Endeavor" by Timothy Keller. In it he argues that most people pursue careers that they weren't wired to have. So you have people working in the financial sector who weren't designed to work there yet they chose those careers because our society gives worth to jobs like that. The problem is you have people working in the financial sector who don't enjoy their jobs because they weren't wired to do those jobs. They were wired to do other jobs, perhaps, jobs that society doesn't give any worth to. So, my second piece of advice is to do something you'll enjoy doing. Don't take a job that's a chore. Don't take a job that you need to sustain a particular way of life. Take a job that makes you happy and gives you a sense of accomplishment and purpose.
I've been a masters student so I know there's not a lot of time for additional reading, but if you find time, read "Every Good Endeavor" by Timothy Keller. It has really helped me in my view of work.
That's my two cents.
Jason
Have you looked into graduate assistantships? Most pay for your schooling and some! And just about every department has them!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your insight Meggan & Jason! I will definitely take it into consideration! I really need to hear other people's point of views & really appreciate you taking the time to give me your insight! :)
ReplyDeleteAnna - Yes, I have TWICE! And they apparently don't want me :( I don't know if it's because I'm brand new to the program so they don't really know me that well at all or if I am just not a good candidate whatsoever lol
That sounds like a tough situation chica...I know how tough it is to balance school and an intense work load. I guess I would keep looking for another job. Sure, it will look great on a resume, but you have your whole life to build that up. I think it's really important to enjoy this stage of your life before rushing into the next one. I wish I could help more, but know I'll be praying for you. Call me this weekend maybe?? Miss you
ReplyDeleteRead the whole thing. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd Erica, you are magnificent. You have definitely sounded to fit the bill for this job. Whether or not it's the right time to accept the position is only yours to really fully comprehend since none of us truly knows what it's like to walk in your shoes.
Now, with that said, I will just reflect a few thoughts of my own for you to take with an absolute grain of salt!
You are working towards marriage, kids, and possibly a career on top of those things, correct? I think there will always be more work to be done (housework, homework, work on your relationship, etc.) on top of the career/jobs we take on. So part of me thinks, try it now when you don't have kids! Work yourself to the bone if you have to because that's where LIFE HAPPENS. I was always so worried about giving myself too much responsibility and cracking under pressure but now I see those college years as the time where you get to focus on yourself and doing just exactly what's best for YOU. Sometimes that means working your ass off, and other times that means relaxing and taking it a little bit easier on yourself.
[[I only realize this in HINDSIGHT, though. I think that's how life works. You've got to go through it all to have the clarity afterward to say, "Oh man, I don't think I made the right decision!" or "Man! I made the perfect decision there!"]]
I think either way you go, doors are gonna open for you. Sure this would look great on your resume and would be wonderful experience, but if it's not gonna work with your school schedule then you just might have to resign from your position.
And I apologize if this is all over the place and if it just confuses you more! I am praying for you right... now!
Oh man and I'm just rereading my comment and "read the whole thing" meant I read the whole entry - was in reference to the fact that you said we were a trooper if we read the whole blog entry! LOL!
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